Taylor Lautner reaches for Stretch Armstsrong

Someday, I would really like to meet Brian Grazer, look him in the eye and say, “What the hell were you thinking?!”

The latest WTF-ery from the man who produced Real Genius and The Da Vinci Code—but who also produced Undercover Brother and Fun With Dick and Jane—is that Twilight werewolf Taylor Lautner will be playing the titular role in the Stretch Armstrong movie that will now be released in 2012 due to being filmed for 3D.

According to The Hollywood Reporter‘s Heat Vision blog, the plot now goes something like this:

The story developed for the movie, being produced by Imagine and Hasbro, sees an uptight spy who stumbles across a stretching formula, which he takes and must now adjust to in everyday life and when fighting crime.

When I think of Lautner, I don’t think of the word “uptight,” but I think I get why they used the word because now Armstrong has got to expand his boundaries and his imagination to fight crime, yadda, yadda. It’s just the plot seems so boring and now the movie’s starring someone I only like because he looks pretty.

Also noted by THR is the fact that Battleship is getting a sci-fi veneer onto its action plot and that the release date for that film is also getting pushed back to Memorial Day 2012. I’m not sure what director Peter Berg is thinking either because the game is all about the Cold War and it’s also the original turn-based strategy game… hey wait, could he be changing the thought behind the game mechanics and drawing inspiration from Starcraft?

Related Posts: Production date set for Brian Grazer’s Stretch Armstrong movie, Universal and Hasbro sign a six-year pact (updated)

One thought on “Taylor Lautner reaches for Stretch Armstsrong

  • The post was good though says:

    That is one of the WORST photoshop jobs I have ever seen! Even without any kind of knowledge of basic human anatomy, you'd think the “touch-up” guy would have realized how off he was by looking at the nipples alone.

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