Liveblogging the Oscars

This is a new experiment for us here at MovieMake-out.com, which is our liveblog of the 81st annual Academy Awards ceremony. I’ll be your host and lead blogger and I’m hoping that Gordon will be able to chime in from time to time when he’s not working on Monday’s Multiplex comic. (Sorry, Trisha! I was swamped. — gm)

To join in on the conversation and fun, you can either respond below or holla at me by sending a message to “@trishalynn” on Twitter.

Click for the liveblog! (All times are Eastern, ’cause I’m in NYC.)

5:46 pm So I’m destressing before the actual pre-show event by watching “Ace of Cakes.” I do not have any preconceptions about how the actual show will go, despite the producers’ hope of an actual party atmosphere. And as for the rest of you who are actually watching this in your homes or someone else’s homes (and are over the age of 21) here’s a link to the first Oscars drinking game I found via Google that I liked. Alas, I only have one bottle of beer and one bottle of wine in my apartment and must blog, so I can’t play along. Boo responsibility!

6:50 pm Switched over to ABC’s coverage, and man is this boring. One thing that must not be forgotten about this year’s Oscar night is that this will be the first year that advertisements for upcoming movies can be shown during the telecast.

And as we noted in one of our previous posts, we may get to see even new trailers for movies like X-Men Origins: Wolverine (May 1), Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (June 26), and Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (July 17). The question is, of the sole ad spot each distributor will get, which movies will they go with?

6:53 pm And speaking of ABC’s coverage, the audio from the microphone has just cut out during Melissa Leo’s (Best Actress nominee for Frozen River) interview. Let’s hope that Taraji P. Henson’s (Best Supporting Actress for The Curious Case of Benjamin Button) interview goes better. Aw… her namechecking was so cute.

7:14 pm Say what you will about Barbara Walters, but I do love her first follow-up to the dating question she asked Nick Jonas because gave a direct quote for him to rebutt, and though he didn’t, it makes him and the rest of the Jonas Brothers look evasive for not answering. She was a serious journalist once upon a time, and for that I still have a modicum of respect for her.

7:41 pm The money quote from the Barbara Walters interview with Mickey Rourke, about what it would mean to him if he won the Best Actor award: “You can’t eat it, you can’t fuck it, and it won’t get [you] into heaven.” Word.

8:02 pm Oh hooray! Tim Gunn is doing the live red carpet stuff on ABC. I’m good with that, and Kate Winslet is wearing a dress that’s an updated version of the schizoid dress that Kim Basinger wore years ago. Sarah Jessica Parker has vagina-boob arms going on, and it’s kinda sad. [Edit: Perhaps this is pre-taped… but that’s okay by me.]

8:17 pm Mickey Rourke is so freaking hot in Jean-Paul Gauthier. I do not know why the kids from HSM or Miley Cyrus are doing interviews on the red carpet, but if Hannah Montanna: The Movie does get an Oscars nomination next year, I think I will have to puke.

8:27 pm Okay, playing the accountancy sea shanty from Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life while introducing the Pricewaterhouse Coopers guys? Well played, ABC. Marissa Tomei looks like she’s wearing a bunch of cocktail napkins stitched together. And this montage about what the Oscars are going to look and sound like? WTH?

8:28 pm Here we go… after these words from our sponsors.

8:38 pm No opening video montage, and the first song sounds like a mash-up of “Sing, Sing, Sing” and some Aaron Copeland piece. Not a good start, imo. RDJ applauding himself? Awesome. Hugh with a disparaging joke about Australia? OH YEAHHHHH… I think my ovaries are combusting right now. Craigslist dancers? Cheap little backgrounds, and Anne Hathaway singing and doing a Nixon pose? And the finale? Okay, I take it back, this Oscars telecast could be very, very awesome.

8:47 pm Okay, five presenters per award? This could get somewhat tedious, but I think I like the idea of these elder stateswomen passing the torch to the next actresses. Goldie Hawn, I really wish that you had taken a brush to your hair. And the first award goes to…Penelope Cruz.

9:02 pm Well played, Tina Fey and Steve Martin. But I do have to wonder abour Fey’s hair because she reminds me of the woman in the pre-show film for the Star Tours ride at Disneyland. Goddamn, I really want WALL-E to win… and am disappointed when Dustin Lance Black wins for Milk. Lots of applause for Black’s speech and yes, yes, yes! for the equal rights moment in his speech. And is this the beginning of the Slumdog Millionaire steamroll?

9:07 pm Strangest presenter combo of the evening? Jennifer Aniston and Jack Black. I really wanted to pour one out for the Iron Giant mention, because if there’s a movie that really deserved some kudos, that was it. And the Dreamworks/Pixar joke? Would have probably worked coming out of a different presenter’s mouth. Hooray for WALL-E, which was a shoo-in. And look how cute Kumio Kato is… thanking his pencil, and doing a Mr. Roboto joke after winning the best animated short film award.

9:24 pm I think I really like the format for these Oscars, going through them in the order of how a film is made, because a lot of people do forget about the little people. Having the music play under the intro speeches? Is very freaking distracting. I am still not in love with Sarah Jessica Parker’s dress or boobage. Benjamin Button picks up the art direction and make-up awards, which means that it’s trending to be honored more for its technical aspects than its acting ones. The Duchess gets the costume design award, and I’ll bet this screws up a lot of people in their office pools.

9:29 pm Teeny-boppers presenting a movie montage above love? Ugh… and I don’t even know who the girl presenting with SparklyVampire was.

9:35 pm OMGWTF, Ben Stiller?! What the hell is up with these weirdo presenter combos? And Slumdog racks up another win, this time in cinematography.

9:40 pm And… once again, the Sci-Tech award winners get shafted. They didn’t even show more than two of its winners? *rolls eyes* But at least we know that Dreamworks and/or Paramount won’t be able to show any other trailers during this broadcast because they shot their wad with The Soloist.

9:47 pm Comedy montage? Not bad… best moment was when the cinematographer guy got involved, both in the montage and on stage. And here’s another office pool breaker… Spielzeugland (aka Toyland), for best live-action short.

9:57 pm “The musical is back, ladies and gentlemen!” Oh yes, I love it when he dances. But honestly? Wasn’t the very first part of this song a take on “All I Need is the Girl”? It’s a shame that I don’t know who the hell this woman is– oh wait, that’s what the High School Musical kids were doing on the red carpet and whatnot and that’s Beyonce. I am such a dork. ABBA done as a drum and bugle corps number? Not bad, but it’s a shame that you really can’t see the real musicals that are showing on the scrim behind the dancers at the top of the stage. And I totally should have guessed that Bah Luhrmann was behind that.

9:59 pm Green Card + Two Weeks Notice = The Proposal. And there’s Touchstone’s wad blown.

10:08 pm And here we go with the best supporting actor award nominees, and man! I’m actually very happy to see Joel Gray up there. Oh, Cuba Gooding, Jr. Thank you for saying everything we wanted to say when we first heard about RDJ’s part in Tropic Thunder. So glad Heath Ledger won this award, and yes, he did deserve it. *sniffle* Nicely done, Ledger family.

10:15 pm Apparently no one’s surprised that Man on Wire wins best feature documentary. But nicely done, Philippe Petit for not only doing a magic trick on the stage, but balancing the Oscar on your chin. Smile Pinki wins best short documentary; I have to think that Megan Mylan memorized her speech.

10:35 pm Action montage was mostly all superhero movies, and that’s fine with me. Once again, Benjamin Button gets the visual effects award here. I honestly think that when it comes to geek-awards, we shot our wad with The Return of the King and won’t get another chance for two more decades. Whoops, I take that back, we got sound editing with The Dark Knight. And Slumdog Millionaire gets one more for sound mixing, in a category I doubted they’d win. Nice job, giving most of the speech to Resul Pookutty. And here’s another one to Chris Dickens for film editing on Millionaire.

10:50 pm The more I see the promo for “Castle” the less I want to see it, even if it does star Captain Tightpants.

11:01 pm Musical score montage ends with Slumdog Millionaire; is that a sign it’s gonna win? Love Alicia Keyes’ pronunciation. Yep… another one for Millionaire, for original score. Wait, why are there taiko drummers on stage with Hindi dancers? I think that I really like the fact that they were able to blend the songs so well into one song. Hooray for mashups? Will this be yet another Slumdog win? And…. yep. This is starting to get boring.

11:10 pm Though I’m sad that Ploning didn’t get a nomination and glad that Waltz with Bashir was able to be nominated, I know nothing at all about Departure.

11:15 pm Oh, damn… I do believe I detest this new format for this part of the show because I want to see the full images of the people who have died. What the hell is up with this damn sweeping camera bullshit? So pissed off.

11:23 pm Reese Witherspoon is wearing a very strange dress tonight. David Fincher looks like he doesn’t think he’s going to win. Hah! Nice of Danny Boyle to start with a light moment. And he is right that it’s been a pretty good show so far.

11:33 pm Marlee Matlin winning her best actress Oscar was one of my favorite moments. But why did they use the theme from Tara during the announcement of which five previous best actress winners? And Shirley MacClaine’s speech to Anne Hathaway is why I think I love this new idea of having the previous winners present to the present nominees. Of course Sophia Loren is presenting to Meryl Streep. How could she not? But is it just me, or does Loren look like she’s on something? I’m sure Dr. Pauly or Change100 would know. And yay for Kate Winslet, because Anne Hathaway will indeed be back in a future year to win. Oh, how cute is her father for whistling like that? Love his hat.

11:43 pm I hope Adrien Brody kisses the winner of this category, because that would be awesome. And now I’m so curious as to how exactly they matched up these previous presenters with the current nominees. Michael Douglas’ father played opposite Frank Langella. I do not get the DeNiro/Penn connection, unless it’s a Tribeca Film Festival thing. And I also don’t remember when Brad Pitt worked with Anthony Hopkins. Kinda disappointed Mickey Rourke didn’t win, but this is definitely going to make me try and catch Sean Penn in Milk if they decide to show it again. “I do know how hard I make it hard to appreciate me,” “Commie homo-loving sons of guns” and his admonishment at the end to the Proposition 8 supporters makes this one of the best speeches ever.

11:53 pm And finally, at the end of the evening, our grand prize winner is… Slumdog Millionaire, with almost the entire cast and crew coming up on stage to accept the film.

And we’re out of here…!